I nearly died in Thailand. Twice.
THAILAND HERE WE COME!
For those of you who don’t know, I spent 4 years of my life in Sydney, Australia. My time there can ultimately be described as the best years of my life (thus far)
Whilst living down under I would have been a fool not to advantage of the cheap flights you can get to Asia. I’m talking cheap as in London to Amsterdam or Europe cheap.
Me and my mate decided to book a flight to Thailand, and what was even better, we booked during Thailand’s monsoon season-which obviously makes it cheaper-ain’t no one trying to get caught up in a typhoon, but me. lol
Day 1 - Arrival
Phuket is a beautiful place, the people, the tall tree’s, the airport, yike’s - that’s another topic for a different day- It was giving Peckham Lidl checkout service on a Sunday.
But that does not take away from how beautiful the place is.
I couldn’t help but notice the electricity poles and how dangerous they looked. I can’t lie, it riddled me with anxiety when they started to spark, it was giving a fire could break out any minute. I was reassured by the locals that this was normal despite these poles looking like they had been built by cave men.
Nevertheless, we checked in at a beautiful hotel called The Charm Resort which was four stars. Four star hotels are very common in Phuket, most of the hotels are to a very good standard, you’ll get good bang for your buck. Also, if you do end up going during Monsoon season, be ready for the blackouts, if you know, you know. Hahaha!
Day 2: Searching for the excursion
On every street corner of Phuket there are tourist guides waiting to sell you an experience or an excursion. Me and my friend were up for doing some snorkelling.
Most snorkelling packages range from 2000-4000 Thai Bhat which equates to £50-£100 ($15-$150 AUD). Me and my friend wanted to be cheap, so we ended up paying £25 which is around 1000 Thai Bhat.
We thought we were being cute because we wanted to save some coins, however, don’t try and thrift on excursions or experiences that involve water. Bad move.
Day 3: The Snorkelling excursion
The weather was overcast, a storm was definitely brewing in the distance. Me and my mate squeezed ourselves on the boat which was packed with people already like sardines. I guess these people were trying to save some coins too.
We stopped off at James Bond Island which was stunning and another touristy island (Krabi) before heading off to some unknown part of the Indian ocean. Yes, an unknown part.
Near death experience
I took swimming lessons in year 4 at Wavelengths leisure centre in Deptford. In my head, I thought those weekly swimming sessions taken when I was 8 equipped me to swim in the open ocean. With this confidence I was ready to jump in. A float for safety, the man in charge of the excursion asked.
I don’t need a float, I can swim.
Please see illustration 1 below.
Yess….idiottttt
Illustration 1
Can you spot the difference compared to those around me and me?
After 10 seconds of being in the water, I started to panic.
I realised this is not a joke or a game, I can’t see the bottom of the ocean, tourists are doing backflips from the boat, like it was the Olympics, I cant see no safety rope. This was getting peak.
Remember I told you about the storm brewing? Yep, it started to rain, the current of the water was moving mad. The current at this point had your girl half a mile away from the boat. This was not how expected this to go down.
I tried to grab unto a good sized Asian man for help, but he told me “Get off him, as we all cannot swim” in his strong accent.
That bitch tried to leave me for dead.
I was just drifting away into abyss.
At this point I was mentally preparing myself, saying in my head that if this is how God wants me to go out, so be it.
But thankfully, see illustration 2
Illustration 2
A doughnut float (with string attached) having to pull me back unto the boat. Wig still in tact, but I was embarrazzed & disgraced.
I was hurled in by a Thai guy in charge of the excursion watched me with disappointment, As he slowly pulled me through the crowd of people who clearly had more experience at this type of adventure. t
Anyway, I give God thanks, because I’m here to tell the tail and make light of a very frightening situation.
Shout out to my friend who managed to take pictures in my distress lol! Love you girl!
After the madness, I decided to hit the town strip which is full of life and things to do.
BIG UP BANGLA ROAD!
The people are really friendly and regardless what hue or shade of black you are, you will often get mistaken for Beyoncé which come’s with perks.
Street Food
After the ordeal!
Day 4: Fast Alice decides to eat street meat
If you don’t know what I mean by fast Alice, let me explain. Have you watched Alice in wonderland? Don’t you think she was an absolute busy body? She had no business getting lost or finding that secret garden. She was too damn FASSSS.
If you look for things you have no business looking for, just be mindful it might not go so well.
In my case, I went to the Thai street food market. Event though it’s monsoon season the humidity was mad. I thought it was a good idea to satisfy my hunger by nyaming street meat.
Sadly, I couldn’t even tell you what meat I ate, but I paid for it on the plane back home. Have you ever felt that your organs are trying to escape through your rare end? The fever, the cold sweats. Worse feeling.
GO TO THAILAND IT’S FUN!!
In conclusion, would I go to Thailand again? Absolutely! Is it worth the visit! the people are really kind, I felt safe walking alone as a female, It’s great value for your money and it seems like the only place where you can get coconut ice cream with mango bits which i haven’t been able to find outside of Thailand. I would go back for that alone.
I hope you enjoyed reading this as much as I enjoyed writing this. I hope it made you laugh.
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Lots of Love and sending you positive energy!
Yas xoxox
